we tend to see the wind as nothing more than what blows through the trees...

Lightening as mear flashes across a dark sky...

And the roar of thunder only as a sound left behind.

When you add these ingrediants to a canoeing trip, and four crazy inlaws, you may discover an excitement

that only God could provide.

I decided to take a walk around town last Saturday, first to the park, where I had a beer and a cigarette.

Then to my best friends house, who happens to be my ex-mother-in-law.....

We had been experiencing scatterd thunderstormes and showers all week, but this day would be memorable.

Despite the storms in front of our face and the warnings on the radio we headed out anyway.

On the way to our drop-off spot we went through some pretty heavy down-poors, as well as some really clear

skies.

Canoes in the water, we headed down river. Enjoying the chance to get out like we so love to do, we were all giggles and the occasional redneck, yell out!

We made our jokes as the music was constantly inturrupted by the emergancy brodcast system, warning all dumb asses out on the river should head to shelter NOW.

Instead of panic, excitement hit in, along with a couple shots of adreniline.

As we fought against a wind trying to push us back up river, We smiled and youuuuu hooooed down a little further.

The sky grew darker and darker, and we faught even harder, with the rain on our faces, light flashing all around, and the extreme vibrations of the following thunder we strapped on for our 8 seconds of God's given rodeo.

One of my best canoeing trips ever.

There is a definate time to fear God, but there is most definatly a time to just trust and hang on.

I felt as though He showered us with rain, and winds, and all the excitement that he did, for as much His enjoyment as ours.

I know that with every yell he smiled in only a way that God could.

I love what he does for me.

This Time of Year

You know, I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent woman. Although most of my education for life came from the streets, it has taught me some of the worst things and at the same time some of the best.
It's has taught me that being a single mom didn't mean you had to be mistreated by a man, or anyone for that matter, in order to put food on the table. I have done it all! Everything from center stage stripper, to plumber, make-up artist, even ran an art gallery for a while in Texas. It's put the brain into motion.
While all the good times have taught me how to love, love also taught me how to hate, and God is teaching me that I'm all wrong. Because in the end it's the hate that seems to make us love again.
There's something crazy about this time of year for me. My oldest son's birthday is July 9, and he'll be 17 by the way. Shortly after his 1st birthday my dad took him away as one last slap in the face. Every birthday after that for the past 16 years has been the hardest times of my life. He was my first child, my son, the day of his birth he made me a mother. I've never experienced love so deep. The next birthday he was gone and I've never hated more. But with the much wanted, constant interruptions from God, I am also learning what it means to love "everyone."
I lift a burden off of my shoulders by forgiving. My heart spills out with prayers for my enemies. I don't wish horrible lives on anyone. As cruel, and selfish as I have been in my time, I understand what it is to be the enemy. How some people have been able to forgive me is beyond belief. The fact that they have, is a true blessing.
So Joshua, Allow me to wish you a very happy 17Th birthday. I know you are tall and handsome, and most likely mean as a snake. But I love you as much today as the first time I held you in my arms.